Ms. Luvly On Love

Strong is not pretending that everything in life is peaches and cream or holding back your emotions. Strong is learning how to deal with the everyday struggles and learning from them. Strong is knowing when to cry, when to hurt, when to be angry. Strong is knowing when to smile, when to laugh, when to be happy. Strong is knowing how to use all those levels of emotions to build a better soul. Not a ct like you have no emotion. Strong is knowing how to handle a situation with out judging and trying to see things clearly. Strong is knowing when to share your emotions with family and friends. Strong is using the vessel that God gave you to it's fullest. That's what I do everyday in my life and if people don't appreciate that about me than so be it...

Some people get into relationships for the wrong reasons. Everything seems so peaches and cream in the beginning, but once things start to go sour then what? As a women things go sour and we still try to fight for it, knowing that we are in a fight by ourselves. Ladies once you feel it's over it's over. Stop trying to make shit out of nothing. I say this from experience. Think about when you are in a situation and you don't like how it's going. You feel in your gut that it's not right but you continue on trying to make it work. Why the hell is that. Why not just cut your loses and keep it moving instead of suffering. That's like I tell people all the time, how it is before you get married is how it's going to be after. It you argue all the time in your relationship and there is no communication then that's how it's going to be. People don't change and if they do it's rare. I'm not going to say all because some people only have to mature.

We all have been there at one point in time where we want to control our mans every action figuring it will keep him in check. But does it work? I really don't know, but I dont think so. I know they say men love bitches but DAMN, do it have to come to that point of control to keep a man. I want a man to want to be with me and want to be faithful to me without me having to check up on him and search through his things and questioning him. That 21 question thing is only fun when it's positive. That's why 50 cent did the video that way. But  it takes away from the relationship when there is so much insecurity. You lose the fun. I know this guy who was married to a friend of mine. He decided to move on to a new relationship. He is now in the process of getting remarried. So I decided to get back in contact with him just to say hi and congratulate him on his new endeavor. So I sent him a message on facebook. Instead of him responding his fiance responded asking who I was. I said

You have to make love to a real woman's mind first before you can her body. It is all connected and all one. Once you intrigue the woman's mind and consume her thoughts then that's when she will open herself up physically to you. Once that woman opens herself up to you and give herself to you then that is when you capture her heart. But you can also capture a woman's heart just mentally alone. It does't have to be a physical connection to achieve her heart it can be all mental. There is such a high connection when the minds are combined and intertwined as one before the bodies unite. People don't realize that mental stimulation is one of the biggest form of for play. If I can't connect with you on a mental level and you can't make me moist with just your words (and I don't mean sexual words) then most likely the sex won't feel like anything and will be dry as a desert. So to make love to a woman in whole you must connect with her mind and seduce 

As women we need to love ourselves enough to know when it isn't love. Some women spend their life looking for "The One". Does such a prince really exist? I believe so. I have always been open with myself and my life. Having experience marriage of over 10 years, I have learned a thing or two. I knew in that marriage that he was not my prince charming. Now back in the dating scene, it almost seems impossible to weed thru the weeds to find that one beautiful flower. But is it worth the challenge? The more time I have spent single the more I was starting to give up. Meeting false love and players. But I don't really let it sour me. I talk a lot of shit but I haven't really given up. I have learned that it truly takes time. If you don't want that false love you are going to have to weed through them in order to find that one that God put here for you. Then when you do find them don't expect it to always happen overnight. Maybe you are not ready for them or they

I really have a hard time understanding how a man expects a woman to accept flirting. There is a thin line with flirting. When dealing with a relationship you have to be careful of that line. It's an easy line to cross. Laughing smiling is light flirting. But once you get into sexual conversation that's cheating. Regardless if it is meant or not. Because eventually one of the persons who is in on the flirtation will want to follow thru. This is were the temptation comes into play. What is the point. Is there a lack of intimacy in the relationship? Probably so. But flirting is a game that should not be played by people in a relationship. If you are 100% single then go for it, but if you are entertaining a relationship, you are only asking for trouble...

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Is it really possible for a man and woman that used to be lovers just become friends? Once that line of intimacy is crossed and there are mutual feelings, even if the feelings aren't exactly the same can it work? There are times where two people start as friends, have sex and continue to be friends. That to me seems to be an easier situation. There probably wasn't that relationship type love. It was just sex. But for those people that crossed the line with sex and more can they go to being friends as if nothing ever happened? This is a topic I am really curious on getting opinions on. I my self have never been friends with someone that I had a relationship with that went beyond sex. I usually cut people completely off never to talk to them again. Or most of the time the relationship ended in anger so there was no need to talk or speak to that person ever again. But if the relationship didn't really end but both parties just decided to be friends, will it work. What if they

How can a woman think that a man that she never seen before and met online is her man. Is the words of that man that strong? What is it in the lies he spreads that makes the woman easy to spread. Are the women that hard up for attention. Is there a desperate need of affection. Is that man so hard up for attention that he wrecks the woman's emotions. Why do some women think it is ok to fall in love with a man they never seen or met? I think it is a desperate need for attention. I think both parties lack something in there life. Sweet words of nothing typed into the woman's vision making her crazy in love with a man from afar. Sweet reckless words of nothing give a man power over his victim to do what he pleases to he mind and heart knowing that the words are shallow and empty. I laid next to a man for years as he typed sweet nothings into a woman's eyes and whispered sweet nothings into her ear. Never meeting this woman but leading her to believe that he was. Sending this wo

Okay men, this is towards you. This is one rule that I know if you follow will stop a lot of drama in your relationship with women. This is something that I know you have heard at least once in your relationship. This rule is a very easy yet simple rule that you can follow. This rule is... (Drum roll)... Pick Up The Phone and Call Your Mate!!! That's it. That's all you have to do. Most of the time a woman will feel secure and happy once they hear from their man. We start to become insecure when a man acts strange. Guilt prevents some men from calling their mates. Up to no good and scared to call. If you just pick up the phone and say, "Hey babe, you ok I'm cool what are you doing ok me neither be home in a few." What ever. But a lot of arguments will not exist if all you did was call your girl. lol That simple. Also only answer questions that are asked. Once you start adding all the extra information your ass looks guilty. What do you have to prove if you did noth

The biggest mistake I think a couple can ever make. I don't even want to live with my husband if I get married again. lol Something seems to happen to a relationship when there is cohabitation. Things seem to be happy and fun when you don't live together. You are so excited to see the person and looking forward to over night visits. Then you think, wow things are so great, why don't we move in together. We spend so much time together it just feels right. Well that feeling of right is a wrong feeling. You lose time with your partner. All the laughter seems to disappear. You are leaving when they come in. The real TIME that used to be spent is now gone. It seems that people think just because they are under the same roof at the same time that is spending time. The going out ends. The really enjoying each other time doesn't exist any more. Then you start to get on each others nerves and then dislike starts to set in. How do you keep the fun the joy the excitement in the re

I like Shanel Cooper-Sykes Views on love and life so I decided to post one of her videos that I watch frequently . Check her out www.shanelcoopersykes.com

Open marriages should not exist. That simple. What more can I say. Do I have to elaborate? Of course I do. I am so against open marriages and open relationships. I think once you tell your partner you are all for them then that's how it should be. I know relationships can get rather boring, but you have to keep them spicy. In and out of the bed room. But if you open your relationship up it is a recipe for disaster. That's like couples having three somes. Someone is bound to get jealous. Feel like less effort it put on them and more with the other person. An open marriage dont solve problems, it creates more. Marriage is meant to be a pure unity between TWO people. If you still want to play the field just dont settle. You might as well not get married. Don't make the lame ass excuses saying, "Oh we have an open marriage." That's BS because trust one of yall is enjoying it more than the other....

Ok, mostly everything I write about is from experience. As I have grown and been through relationships I started to notice tail tail signs when a relationship is coming to an end. So here goes... Every conversation turns into an argument. No matter what you are talking about it always turns into an argument. If you want to know if your man is interested in someone just listen to who they talk about. They will always talk about one particular female that is such a good friend or is so smart or so cool. That's who they want to bang. TRUTH. As soon as a guy starts talking to me about another female I automatically know they are interested. They spend less time with you and say they spend a lot of time with you. When did sleeping in the same bed become spending time. lol They stop calling you. A whole day will go by and you won't hear from them. Remember way back when, when they would call you just because. Now it's only if they need something and that something is not you. Or

Insecurity is one of the biggest problems in a relationship. But how do you avoid this problem? No matter how strong the individual they all at one point they fall victim to insecurity. Where does it start? With some people they actually bring it into a new relationship as baggage and with other they develop in their current relationship. Their partner does one thing that makes a person lose trust then the insecurity builds or a partner starts acting funny and out of the norm and a person loses faith. Is there a cure for insecurity. Some insecurities are about the individuals self worth and some just base it on their partner. The worst are the people that are insecure within themselves. If they dont feel worthy of their partners love then they feel insecure. They have to have self love first in order to not take their insecurities out on their partner. Some people are very secure within themselves but just lost their faith because the partner lied or cheated. But all is still a relatio

This goes for both male and females but I really can only speak to my ladies because I am not a man. lol But I know that women feed men just as much bullshit on the sites that men do. But I still can only speak for the women. Or actually too the women... Now why is it women on social networks believe all the BS that men say to them over the internet? Cant you see thru the lies. lol OMG it is so bad. Are women so desperate for a mans attention that they will actually believe tha what a man says on a social site is true. They feed you all these wack lines like they mean it. If they telling you they love you or they dont think of anyone but you, do you not realized how many other people they say that to and probably are typing it to someone else at the same time. Are women that dense. Come on ladies get it together. It is no difference over the phone. I am not saying its not ok to flirt but if that man isn't making real time to see you or spend time with you and it is all over the ph

I seen this on the internet and it can be so true so I decided to post it... Ladies are you guilty of telling any of these lies... 1. "I haven't had sex in a while, but not by choice." Women have the luxury of having sex whenever they want because there are very few men that will actually turn down a physical encounter. In the rare case that a woman does come across a guy who says "no," there's probably a string of others behind him that will say yes. In fact, any man that hears this lie would probably sleep with that woman right then and there. So if a woman has gone a extended period of time without sex she has done so completely by choice. 2. "I'm looking for a good man." Then why do you keep dating losers? Women say they want a certain type of man but oftentimes end up dealing with guys that are the complete opposite, while the supposed "good" guys are left by the wayside. Clearly, women don't know what they want or

Today I had a conversation with a good friend. She did something that she wasn't happy about. The whole time her mind was telling her not to do it. But she was following her heart. I am tell everyone right now, DO NOT FOLLOW YOUR HEART!!! The heart will get you in so much trouble. Think with you mind, that's what it is there for. Have you ever been in that situation where you knew you shouldn't deal with a person but you heart was so in love. Your mind knew what it was talking about lol . It did!! It said this is not the person for you or you should not have sex with this person, but Noooo you didn't listen to you mind you followed your heart and now you are hurt or upset. So this is a short blog and a lesson for today. Don't follow your heart listen to the mind because it will lead you down the right path every time.

This is to the Ladies... Acknowledgement... isn't it needed? If you spend an ample amount of time with a man, wouldn't you expect some acknowledgement? You work hard on your grind and you work hard to support them on their grind but you get no acknowledgement. That is not good. Why is it that some men don't show as much love and respect as that lady shows them. Now Fellas you can join in on. Why does that happen? Is there a hidden agenda?

In the beginning of a relationship you get butterflies in your stomach just to think about that person. You can't wait to see them. You get so excited. It's all fun, laughs and good ole times. But then it fizzles... What happens? Where does that excitement go. Next thing you know there comes the arguing, fight and mistrust. The staying out late, not coming home and no phone calls. Why must it be like that? How do you get that infatuation back? I was thinking about this. I think the friendship is lost along the way. When you lose the friendship is where you lose the fun. I actually think that falling in love is the worst emotion there is next to anger. Those are the two emotion that you actually don't think straight. I think I would rather love someone than fall in love. I have been trying to do a lot of research to figure out how to get that spark back. Get those butterflies fluttering again. What I found out on a woman's side is to actually back off and give a man spac

So on my radio show the other day, my co host Big Mike and I had a discussion on faking it during sex. Pretending like you are satisfied but you are really not. What is your take on that? I personally think that nobody should ever fake it. How do you get pleasure from the whole experience if you let your partner think that they have satisfied you. I understand stroking an ego but for real? Then I said to Mike that I don't think that men can fake it. I told him I think that me are easy. They get stiff fast and release just as fast. A woman should know if a man fakes it or not. I also believe that a man should know if a woman fakes it. You should know the way her body moves when she is at her climax. It's not just about the moaning its more to it. So who has faked it? Not me. lol

What Women Want   Men try to guess and speculate about what a woman really want from them, but from my point of view I can give you the 411 on what we want and what we need. I can't speak for all women but I can definitely speak for me... 1. Honesty - the truth hurts but it beats being caught in a lie because that kills. 2. Respect - it's okay to look at other women but to stare is bad. Respect us as your woman, respect our jobs or careers. Respect our parenting, respect our feelings some of us are too damn sensitive. 3. Unconditional love - love us flaws and all. Everyone is not build like a model and who wants to be! Some of us have curves that won't quit and bodies that are thick and we know how to work it!!! 4. Stability - We all are not 100% independent! Yes we can take care of ourselves but at the same time some of us wants that support and caring. We want to feel secure to the point that if we lose our job or change jobs you will be there to support financiall